Clear The Room, Stat!

If you find yourself in a half-empty apartment, disheveled by brown moving boxes and the Hefty garbage bags that are starting to haunt your dreams and fill your reality, promise me something.  When your late-night lust for snacking creeps up on you like a sneaky tiger, push it away with both hands.  This is especially important  when you've moved all of the food items out of your house, except the ones you'll eat for breakfast and those leftover baking ingredients that you wish you weren't going to throw out (but should've already, since you haven't had an oven in a month and a half).

Above all, avoid eating italian-seasoned bread crumbs by the spoonful.  I don't care how salty and garlicky it tastes, or how easily it becomes a very yummy, chewable ball in your mouth.  In ten minutes, you will have the breath of a monster fueled by breadsticks, fresh garlic, and hellfire.  If you aren't convinced, your spouse will be sure to inform you.

And when you wake up the next morning, you'll wish you could use chlorine bleach to rinse your mouth with, because coffee is not going to cover that up.  I have a feeling my co-workers will be quarantining me giving me plenty of space to "focus on my work" for the day.

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