Show Me The Money

It’s hard to know which of the following make today an exceptional day:  the real beginning of March Madness, or St. Patrick’s Day. 

Call me naive, but I didn’t entirely realize that gambling is illegal until my husband informed me this morning (I blame my sister.  Why?  No reason).  All this NCAA bracket business, and you can’t actually put money on it??  Where’s the fun in that?  I’ve bet on March Madness before, while working in a youth detention facility, within the United States, knowing nothing about the teams.  Which is the real crime here? 

Anyway, for those of you like me who didn’t know yet, gambling is in fact, illegal. So, act fast and put away that five bucks you’re about to add to the office pool – the CIA’s coming to take you down.

Since we've covered gambling, here is a list of other laws I find suprising:

• Shotguns must be taken to church in the event of a Native American attack.  This law comes from Maine, and therefore should surprise no one.
• In Utah, no person may have “relations” in the back of an ambulance if it is responding to an emergency.  So it’s ok as long as you’re going to McDonald’s?
• When using interstate 95, every container truck is required to occasionally carry miniature watercraft.  This is not actually true, but I took the photo below on Tuesday.  The boat measured under ten inches, and it totally made my day.  

My, what tiny cargo you have.

• If you're in Alderson, West Virginia, you may not walk your lion, tiger, or leopard, even if it’s on a leash.
• It is illegal to push a live moose out of an airplane if you're flying over Alaska. 
• In Blairstown, New Jersey, no street sign may be staked that could “obscure the air”.  This from the state that doesn’t let you pump your own gas.  If the regional I.Q. was in question before, this certainly cleared that up.

And finally, my personal favorite, also from the great state of Maine: After January 14^th, you must have removed your Christmas decorations, or you will face a fine.

Uh.

You must be joking.  Enforcing this law would be like trying to block a charging rhino using oven mitts. 

You're never

going

to stop it. 

 www.namibian.org

And you're never going to collect those fines either - you can kiss that budget surplus goodbye.

So fill out your bracket and throw 10 bucks in the pool.  Then put on a green shirt and go take your leopard for a walk in West Virginia.  

Take advantage of the holiday and live a little.